I am deeply sorry

Forgive me ‘cause I’m not the person you all want me to be
Forgive me ‘cause I’m weak and unwilling to try
Forgive me for letting you down, again and again
Forgive me ‘cause I’m far from perfect
Forgive me for running away from everything
Forgive me for resenting you for what’s mine
Forgive me ‘cause I’m looking for excuses after excuses
Forgive me ‘cause I thought I could live on my own
Forgive me ‘cause it turned out I was wrong
Forgive me ‘cause I might have deluded you
Forgive me for promising what I couldn’t fulfill
Forgive me ‘cause I’m not honest enough
Forgive me ‘cause I’m not strong enough
Forgive me for pretending to be everything
Forgive me ‘cause the truth is I am nothing
Forgive me for all my mistakes
Forgive me ‘cause I can’t fix them good
Forgive me for being so complicated
Forgive me for being so fucking absurd
Forgive me for not doing what’s right
Forgive me ‘cause I know I have it in me I just don’t want to
Forgive me ‘cause I’m too afraid to love
Forgive me for shielding myself from everything else
Forgive me for being so melodramatic
Forgive me for all these unnecessary whining
Forgive me for all the desperation I inflict upon you
Forgive me for all the effort I’m not making
Forgive me for being who I am today
And please forgive me for not trying to change

The truth is, I don’t feel like changing
At least not today
Because my frustration and desperation are all I have
And I’m not letting go


-me

Quote of the day:
"Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live." -Dorothy Thompson